Loneliness: The Worst Disease..

I attended a conference recently about helping men and women in prison to re-enter society.  It was very interesting and I want to share many things with you.

One quote I heard while there was this:  Mother Theresa was asked this question many years ago.  What is the worst disease you have ever encountered?   Her answer was, “Loneliness.”  The great sadness associated with her answer is that the men and women in prison who feel this great loneliness…for the vast majority of them – it did not start in prison – they were lonely, angry, and afraid long, long before they landed in prison.

One of the speakers talked about the “lenses we look through.”  As if we are looking through some kind of “glasses,” by the time we are about 3 and 1/2 years old, we are looking through the lenses of our caregivers…which means we are “seeing” life “through their eyes.”  We will likely have a great many of the same prejudices, beliefs, biases, likes, and dislikes of our caregivers.  This means that it is “natural” for us to automatically act like our parents (or the persons who raised us).  For some of us – that was not good news.   But, the bigger picture IS good news – if you are willing to do a lot of THINKING and if you have a lot of DETERMINATION, you can go to work on changing yourself.  You can transcend(overcome) those cultural biases for your greater good.  It will take time…months and years and yes, you will sometimes still think or act like your dad, but on the whole, you CAN BE your own man (or woman)!  If you can afford it, I always recommend a good Therapist to help you.  Individual or group therapy would benefit you greatly.

Another speaker emphasized how prison effects men and women.  Very soon, men and women learn:   Don’t trust—Don’t talk—Don’t feel—         You must fight these temptations to “shut down”.  You must find the good people and stay in contact with them and with God who created you and watches over you.  The same speaker discussed how prison “slowly takes your living skills away from you…you become “institutionalized” and begin to fear life beyond the walls.

If you are in prison, hang on to as much of your independence as you can my friends.  To the extent that you can, make your own schedule.  The more of your daily decisions that you can make – the better.  Try to make 40 to 50 decisions per day.  Count your decisions!  Most persons in prison make 25 decisions or less.  This is POOR PRACTICE for your life when you get out!  Stay in touch with what is going on in our society.  The laws, the technology…things like that.  As you do these things, you will know that you are preparing yourself to live on the outside again.  And I also believe that this type of preparation will help relieve your feelings of loneliness.  You might even consider starting a Preparation group.  How about a “Preparation H” (Home) group?!  ha ha…bet you guys didn’t know I had a sense of humor.  Okay…corny…

God bless you and Merry Christmas,

Macky

Light your world..

This time of year can be especially sad for those who are in prison or for those who have family or friends who are in prison.  Please open your heart.  Please hear me:  There is HOPE.  You can hope and know that it is not futile.  It is never wrong to hope.

Matthew 5: 14-16 tells us:

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.

Nor do men light a lamp and put it under a peck measure, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all in the house.

Let your light so shine before men that they may see your moral excellence and your praiseworthy, noble, and good deeds and recognize and honor and praise and glorify your Father Who is in heaven.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Your light can shine no matter where you are!  Your light can shine no matter where your family and friends are!  Attitude can change your view of the world…I encourage you as I encourage myself to dig deep and bring out the best smile we can.  Let’s show those around us that no matter what our circumstances are that we are going to light up our little corner of the world.

Life will ALWAYS present you with challenges…ALWAYS.  We must learn to THRIVE during the persecution, not just survive!  If we set out minds, we can actually use the challenging situations to teach us patience – or perhaps there is another lesson the situation your problem can teach you.  Use your wisdom to search out the lesson that your problem is trying to teach you.  Sometimes it is obvious and sometimes it is not.

My suggestion to all of you is to help people. Rather than sit around feeling sad, help someone.  You do not have to spend money.  Open a door for someone.  Read a book to a child.  If you do have a little money, buy a meal for someone who needs it.  Helping others is an amazing blessing.

DON’T LET THE HOLIDAY SEASON TAKE YOUR MOOD DOWN!  DECIDE TO GIVE AND FIND PEACE IN THE SEASON.

Wishing you much love and happiness as you let your light shine..

The Journey to Happiness Takes Nine (9) Steps, Step 5: Are You Angry..Do you Hold Grudges? It is Time For You to Understand Mercy…

How are you faring on our journey to happiness?  Have you stayed on the path or have you taken some unnecessary and costly detours?  Do not be discouraged because everyone of us gets off the path at one time or another.  And because each of us is uniquely made…well…we will get off the path in many different ways.

I got off the path this week and it was in the area that I am writing about today!  It was in the area of mercy.  I have seen God work like this so many times.  I will be wanting to write about a certain area – thinking that just maybe I have a little success in the area and  * BOOM *  I get off the path.  I did not even know I was going in the wrong direction until I began to sense that I was in the wilderness!  Briefly – here’s what happened:  Where I work, I asked for volunteers from the people who work for me and then I became upset when not everyone volunteered!  Later, one person came to me to discuss something else, and I confronted him about not volunteering.  He tried to explain that he did not understand how important the project was to me and then – he volunteered to help!  Guess what I said (remembering I was off the path!?!)  I said that I didn’t think that his help was needed because if he had REALLY wanted to help…he would have volunteered in the first place!

As I sit here now, I am feeling remorseful and know that I need to tell him I apologize for my reaction to his “late” volunteering.  I have to admit (sitting here now) that I was angry at him (and the others) and after he tried to do the right thing…he tried to volunteer to help me…I showed him no mercy…I showed him no compassion.  To be honest, and I am sorry to say it, but I was very unfriendly about it.

In the first place, I should have communicated my true feelings about the project to those who were working with me.  And if I expected everyone to help, I should have simply made it mandatory!  But I didn’t, and I got off the Christian path.  I let my emotions guide my behavior.  I hurt the feelings of a good man.

The point is this:  without the mercy and compassion of our creator God, we would not even be alive.  We would not draw in one more breath.  Think about it.  Think about all the times you can show mercy to someone who you think may have let you down in some way…someone that you are angry at…someone whose personality does not always flow smoothly with your personality.  Think of those who depend on you and who, without your good will, would have a harder/rougher life.

Often, people in positions of power (whether it is a little power or a great deal of power) can adopt an arrogant attitude almost without even trying.  When this arrogance sneaks in…we must RUSH back to Step 1:  Humility – we must know that each of us has equal value in God’s eyes.  We must never forget who we are and who we are not.

Passage Matthew 5:7:
Blessed (happy, to be envied, and spiritually prosperous–with life-joy and satisfaction in God’s favor and salvation, regardless of their outward conditions) are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy!

I want the MERCY OF GOD at the end of my time on earth!  Let’s continue down the path together.  Encourage one another.

God bless each of you!